The "After" Photo
Have you ever been so caught up in what you were doing, or so busy congratulating yourself at what a fabulous multitasker you are that you literally can't see the forest for the boobs?
It had been a long time since I'd baked any cupcakes here at the ol' Muffin Tin. However, I was feeling inspired by a lot of cupcake gifts I received from friends for my birthday this year (and probably every birthday hereafter for the rest of my life. Great.) A few weeks ago, a small group of super cool ladies were going over to the Great Dane's to watch the Oscars, so I decided to whip up a batch of sweet and lovelies. Someone had given me a cupcake mix from Sprinkles Cupcakery, possibly trendy in a city near you. (Could you be so lucky as to pay $3.25 for a cupcake? Check out the "Coming Soon" Locations) I opened the very nicely designed package and found a vanilla cupcake mix for 12 cupcakes and candy discs to decorate. So I decided to make the vanilla cupcakes and make my own orange butter cream frosting with orange extract and orange mango juice.
I wasn't thrilled with the way the cake part came out, but I think that was my fault for over beating the eggs. I managed to get 16 cupcakes out of the mix and I was very excited to decorate with the mod brown and pink candy discs. First, since I had made orange frosting, I decided to color the frosting orange. I didn't want anything too pale, but I also didn't want a frighteningly electric color. I used the yellow food dye first, then mixed in drops of red. I also found some pink cake icing in my cupboard. I decide to put down a circle of pink icing first, then smoosh the candy discs on top, to create a pink halo around the brown candy. So after putting a base or orange frosting on (delicious), I plopped pink icing onto the center of all of the cupcakes. I was just about ready to to add the whimsical toppers when I looked down at my tray. And staring back at me I saw 12 breasts, Caucasian, about a C Cup, I'd say.
Oh crap. How could I have not noticed that I just produced charming little cupcake tits? Six pair, no less! My first thought was "Ahhhhh! I hope the candy circles makes this a lot less obvious!". My second thought was a very calm, "Well, if I ever need to make cupcake boobs, I think I've got the recipe down." Who do you think makes more money: a career administrative assistant, or an erotic baker? Never mind, I don't want to think about it.
The "Before" Photo - yes, that's a box of Marshmallow Peeps in the background. What can I say? It's the most wonderful time of the year.
