The "After" Photo
Have you ever been so caught up in what you were doing, or so busy congratulating yourself at what a fabulous multitasker you are that you literally can't see the forest for the boobs?
It had been a long time since I'd baked any cupcakes here at the ol' Muffin Tin. However, I was feeling inspired by a lot of cupcake gifts I received from friends for my birthday this year (and probably every birthday hereafter for the rest of my life. Great.) A few weeks ago, a small group of super cool ladies were going over to the Great Dane's to watch the Oscars, so I decided to whip up a batch of sweet and lovelies. Someone had given me a cupcake mix from Sprinkles Cupcakery, possibly trendy in a city near you. (Could you be so lucky as to pay $3.25 for a cupcake? Check out the "Coming Soon" Locations) I opened the very nicely designed package and found a vanilla cupcake mix for 12 cupcakes and candy discs to decorate. So I decided to make the vanilla cupcakes and make my own orange butter cream frosting with orange extract and orange mango juice.
I wasn't thrilled with the way the cake part came out, but I think that was my fault for over beating the eggs. I managed to get 16 cupcakes out of the mix and I was very excited to decorate with the mod brown and pink candy discs. First, since I had made orange frosting, I decided to color the frosting orange. I didn't want anything too pale, but I also didn't want a frighteningly electric color. I used the yellow food dye first, then mixed in drops of red. I also found some pink cake icing in my cupboard. I decide to put down a circle of pink icing first, then smoosh the candy discs on top, to create a pink halo around the brown candy. So after putting a base or orange frosting on (delicious), I plopped pink icing onto the center of all of the cupcakes. I was just about ready to to add the whimsical toppers when I looked down at my tray. And staring back at me I saw 12 breasts, Caucasian, about a C Cup, I'd say.
Oh crap. How could I have not noticed that I just produced charming little cupcake tits? Six pair, no less! My first thought was "Ahhhhh! I hope the candy circles makes this a lot less obvious!". My second thought was a very calm, "Well, if I ever need to make cupcake boobs, I think I've got the recipe down." Who do you think makes more money: a career administrative assistant, or an erotic baker? Never mind, I don't want to think about it.
The "Before" Photo - yes, that's a box of Marshmallow Peeps in the background. What can I say? It's the most wonderful time of the year.
5 comments:
Well done! You have amazing cupcakery skills. But I think we could come up with a better name than "cupcake tits". I'm thinking something with alliteration or a rhyming pun.
cleavage cakes, perhaps?
i like how you keep referencing peeps to me...i'm not a big fan (an admission that's prolly gonna get me kicked off your blogroll). anyway, i'm more of a cadbury creme egg girl...
I have intentionally made cupcake boobs once and accidentally made them one other time. For the real ones, I tinted vanilla frosting flesh tone and used pinkish accent frosting and candy red hots. For the accidental ones, I used milk chocolate frosting and a raspberry on each one. Both were delicious (and sexy!).
Ha, you were baking with your eyes closed. Thanks for the giggle. Great work.
Where did you get that recipe? The reason I ask, I just was at a bakery in a health food store that had cupcake tits, vegan and I think wheatless, just like that.
You didn't go to the CIA by any chance? ;-)
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