Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Attention Drew Belstock

It has come to our attention that Drew Belstock is not reading the blog. So we will have to continuously post about Drew Belstock so that when he googles himself (egomaniacal twit), these posts will come up. Drew Belstock, darling, move to New York. We'll get a charming two bedroom in Prospect Heights. We'll split the cooking duties and make sangria by the gallon; Fresh Direct will deliver the groceries right to our door! We'll reminisce about Tibor and the sketchy Filipino Karaoke Bar and that diabetic kid you took to Italy. Dave can come too, live across the hall and be our big gay Kramer. This is a utopia of which I sing, Drew Belstock. I know lots of ladies in the city; I could fix you up with a different girl every Friday night for a month and a half, more if you'll consider married women and girls with serious emotional baggage! Please consider it.

This concludes our post about Drew Belstock.


Anonymous said...

Yo. I'll pay you $500 if you fix Drew up with a different girl every weekend for the next month...married women okay. He likes tall blondes with minimal facial hair.

Cupcake said...

Anonymous, I would have taken that offer for $400. Sucker! Unfortunately, Drew still lives in Minnieapolis and the selection of women I know in Minnesota is quite limited. But I couldn't help but notice nearly all the dairy queens and princesses at the Minnesota State Fair were blond and hearty; I did not get close enough to asses their facial hair situation.

I will write to the Minnesota State Dairy Council for their contact information when you put the check in the mail.