Monday, January 09, 2006

What the Hell Happened?


I had high hopes for this weekend, I really did. My plan was to get high speed Internet set-up, connect my digital camera, refinish my dresser, see some friends, babysit, write some letters. So, what the hell happened?

Friday night I woke up in the middle of the night with a premonition that I was about to get really sick. I took some Zinc and went back to bed. The Optimum Online guy was supposed to come between 11am and 2pm and I wanted to get to the hardware store first to purchase everything I needed to start working on my dresser. I knew I was sick, but still managed to get to the hardware store shortly after 9am. While waiting for my paint to be mixed, I got a call from the Cablevision Tech.

"This is your technician. Are you home?"

"Um, no."

"You have an appointment today with Cablevision?"

"Yes, but my appointment is for 11am - 2pm. What time is it now?"

"It's 9:45am, but I'm in your neighborhood now. Will you be home in 10 minutes?"

"No, I really don't think so."

"Okay, but I can't wait for you. I'll have to come back later and I can't guarantee when. It will be before 5pm."

"Look, I have an appointment for 11am - 2pm. That's why I'm out now, so I can be home for 11am. I want you to come between 11am and 2pm."

"I understand, but I'm here now and if you're not here, I can't wait for you. I have to do the other jobs on my route. I'll come back sometime before 5pm."

I was starting to feel sicker and sicker and all I wanted to do was crawl into bed. Maybe if he didn't come until 5pm I could get a nice long nap in. So I told him fine, to do whatever he needed to do. I got home, pushing my granny cart through the freezing cold morning, and now the sick was on in full effect. I unloaded all my paint and tools. Then I climbed into bed; I was freezing so I kept all of my clothes on but I was still cold beneath the covers. Soon, before I could sleep, the buzzer rang. It was the Tech guy. Fine, I thought, at least I'll get this out of the way. The guy came into my apartment and looked around. He said, "Okay, how do I get to the back of the building?"

Now, I live in New York City. I don't know how to get to the back of my building. I don't even know what's out there. Could be a little garden, could be a concrete slab, could be the portal to hell. I live in the front of the building, I have no idea. I tried to persuade the guy to use the front of the building. He said he needed to run the cable from the back. There is a door to the basement on my floor, but it was locked. I called the super, whom I've called only once before. I left a message with a woman dealing with a baby crying in the background. She told me he would be back in ten minutes and I said that he needed to call me as soon as possible. The technician, predictably, told me he couldn't wait. I said, "How come when I made this appointment no one told me I would need access to the back of the building, so I could have alerted my super??"

He said, "I don't know. I guess they figured that you would know I need to get to the back to run the cable." Then, seeing the look on my face he added, "I'm sorry. They should have told you."

Fuck it, by this point I was so weak I could barely stand. The Super, by the way, never called me back. As soon as the Tech left I collapsed into sick despair. I had been running a fever for some time but now I began with the shivering and the moaning. I spent the rest of the day and night slipping in and out of conscoiusness and running a very high fever-alternating from being freezing cold to burning hot and throwing my clothes off accordingly.

On Sunday, I was well enough to pick up the phone when MuppetLover called. I had to cancel our date on Saturday night to see Kissin' Cowboys. Damn, will I ever get to see that movie? MuppetLover was very sympathetic to how crappy it is to get sick when you live alone and she kindly picked up some things I needed and brought them over. Thanks again, MuppetLover! On Sunday I also managed to get five dresser drawers painted. I would have times in between feverish sleep with nothing to do. I wasn't well enough to leave the house, so I figured, why not prime and sand? Amazingly the drawers came out well.

Meanwhile, nothing was working. All of the over the counter medicine I was taking could have bneen ppurchased from a Gag and Novelty Store for all the good it was doing me. I took NyQuil Sunday night and even that had no effect! I went to sleep ... ah, rest... and promptly woke up again, 45 minutes later! I hadn't eaten anything all weekend- the last thing I had to eat was the Sno-Caps I ate at the movies with G4 on Friday night. Sunday night, I forced myself to eat some applesauce MuppetLover brought over. I haven't eaten anything today and have no desire to but I'm wondering how many days you can go without eating before you just pass out. I'm drinking lots of vitamin water, so that's something.

Now I'm sitting at my desk counting the minutes until my 1:30pm doctor's appointment. I hope to go directly home from there-we'll see, I guess. I've tried to reschedule my Optimum Online appointment, but none of the times are good for me and since I'm going away this weekend, it will probably have to be two weekends from now. Pathetic.


PS Today I learned that the German word for hickey is Knutschfleck. Don't ask.

8 comments:

VBeta said...

oh my god! that's horrible. Now I feel bad for the naggy comment on the earlier post. And the way the optimum thing was handled was ridiculous! Why don't companies like that feel the need to operate as if they're accountable for what they do? Aren't consumers demanding that kind of business ethic?
I see you're probably already at the doctor's - good luck with that.

Joshua said...

Dude, that sucks. I see Cablevision is just as evil and woefully incompetent as Time Warner. Man large businesses suck at everything.

jesse said...

I had almost the exact same issue with Comcast. what is it about huge telecom companies that allows them to operate with virtually zero concern for the customer's needs? don't tell me that multinational conglomerates aren't looking out for the little guy.

Joshua said...

They all suck and it pains me because Comcast owns both the Flyers and the Sixers so I want to like them, but they are just as bad as Time Warner, as apparently is Cablevision. Time Warner dicked my apartment around fo-eva.

lebrookski said...

ahhh good ol' Knutschfleck...I had to learn that one out the hard way

Gute Besserung!

LaHipster said...

The guy from Time Warner accused me of being a ho, when I wasn't at my apartment at 8:40 on a Saturday morning, but was there by 9.

THE APPOINTMENT WAS FOR BETWEEN NINE AND ELEVEN, JACKOFFS.

All I'm saying is, pick up a coffee habit and do your computing from the tea lounge.

A said...

I thought the first line of this ended "my plan was to get high" and I nearly pissed myself. That would probably split the world in half huh?

Cupcake said...

I'm kinda glad I'm not the only one having problems with these dickwads. How about we all cancel our cable and internet hook-ups? That'll show 'em.

My new appointment is for Jan. 21 if you can believe it. I am still doubtful I will acheive home internet by the time I turn 25. That will just be sad.