"I see from your blog that you now have home internet access. Welcome to adult life, you frosting-guzzling freak ... Oh, and happy fucking birthday and shit ... just remember, life is hell and you get older every year. Add on to that the fact that you probably won't get any taller and all those cupcakes will have you on dialysis in twenty years. Hey, at least you got internet at home.
My cat has herpes."
Man, I miss that weasely misanthrope.
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