Monday, August 08, 2005

The Manny: Too Good to be Straight?

So after the Ben Folds Concert, Bizzy and I stopped by MommyCakes' house so I could pick up my things, head back to my apartment, unpack and then pack for my trip to Rhode Island. We didn't get to the apartment until about 10:30 and, as planned, The Manny was there with Caliban, already taken over for me.

Although I had only met The Manny once before, it seemed that my impressions held up. He was a sweet, caring, interesting and intelligent guy. I began laying the groundwork to ask him out when I returned from Rhode Island. Bizzy also thought he was a great guy and that I should totally go for it (always nice to have a good friend along for a preliminary vetting session). So as we're sitting there, waiting for a car to pick us up, we're chatting in the living room and having a nice time. The television is on and The Manny goes to turn down the volume. "Sorry," he says, "I was just watching this documentary on ABBA." Immediately I start to get some activity on my Gaydar. Bizzy asks, "Oh, are you an ABBA fan?"

"Well," says The Manny, "I've seen Mamma Mia! twice and I love it. I would go see Mamma Mia! every night if I could!"

Somehow, Bizzy is able to contine pleasant conversation about the ABBA based musical. My Gaydar has gone totally out of control and I am feeling faint. What was progressing along as a nice night has now hit a major hiccup. Think about it. Even considering the heyday of the Navy, the French Restoration and The Age of the Gladiators, I think we all have to agree that "I would go see Mamma Mia! every night if I could!" is the gayest sentence that has ever been uttered in the history of the world.

I am trying not to panic. Perhaps there is hope and The Manny is not gay; see, here's the wild card: The Manny is European. Yes. We are as yet unsure how long The Manny has been living in this country and so, as Bizzy said, "Maybe he just doesn't know ... " Maybe he just doesn't know about the Machismo front he is supposed to present to make us all feel more comfortable with our own sexualities? Or maybe he just doesn't know how incredibly gay that sounded? Then I remembered that I once had a Polish pen pal, an 18-year old boy, that used to write me letters on this beautiful hand-pressed paper and he had lovely handwriting as well. Yes. Yes! So there is hope.

If I can work it out, I think I will ask The Manny out this weekend and see what happens. Oh, did I mention he's a nanny while he's in school getting his degree in nursing? I have two words for you people, no four: Greg Focker, virile heterosexual.

7 comments:

Vanessa said...

It's got to be the European in him that allowed him to say that about ABBA. Hopefully he's a Focker.

Bayard said...

I'm recalling a Will and Grace episode where Jack anticipates Will being mad because Jack saw Mamma Mia without him the week before (they might have gone monthly)- Will then confesses that he went twice that previous week.

Now that I've made a rather funny TV moment terribly unfunny, what did you think of the concert? I looked for you but it was pretty damn crowded. We were sitting right in the middle, directly in front of the VIP guardrails. I thought it was great, and I particularly liked "Late" and "Underground", not to mention his Tom Waits impersonation ...

Cupcake said...

BT- Thanks for confirming that Mamma Mia is indeed the gayest show on the planet. I guess only time will tell if The Manny is a Focker or a Flamer.

I looked for you at the Ben Folds concerts but there were hundreds of tall white guys. Hundreds! I thought about calling your cell phone but it seems I no longer have your number. I had a great time at the concert! I was singing and dancing like a MoFo! Ben did announce that he had woken up with larangytis and you could tell he was off his game but he still totally rocks. He did not play my favorite song from the new album, "Trusted", but I did enjoy "Landed", "Old Bastard", "You to Thank", and all of the older stuff. Bizzy thought his cover of Dr. Dre's "Bitches Ain't Nothin' But Tricks and Hos" was brilliant and we are trying to track down a copy for her boyfriend.

Leah said...

"bitches ain't shit" lives on itunes - at least that is where I bought mine.

I am SO jealous. SOOO jealous.

A said...

i miss you. write more please

Cupcake said...

Edie, you're so sweet. I wish I knit you something nicer than a baggy tube top with two sleeves attached. Oh well, at least it's soft and comfy. Any luck shrinking it?

A said...

a little shrinkage but not in the right ways. on the upside all the other laundry i washed it with has green wooly softness on it. that is both an upside and a downside if trying to look profesh at work. which i'm not, turns out.