All My Earthly Detritous

Have I mentioned that I'm moving on Saturday? Please, in lieu of flowers, just send Target Gift Cards. How stressful is this situation? Well, let's just say that the period of my day formerly known as "sleep" is now known as "the eight hours a day during which I obsess about moving in a horizontal position". I am running exclusively on coffee today and the effects are not pleasant to behold.

How am I handling preparations? Well, I was supposed to spend all weekend packing. In actuality, I spent most of the weekend finding excuses not to pack. It did not seem like I was setting myself up to face dire consequences because, as everyone kept reminding me, "Don't worry, it's not like you have that much stuff."

Strictly speaking, if you are talking about the furniture I own, I guess I don't own that much stuff. Just a bed, a night stand, two book cases, a rocking chair, some shelves, a TV stand sans TV, a table and three kitchen chairs. Not that much stuff. But then once I actually started packing, sometime around 4pm on Sunday, I began to take stock of all the stuff that I've gathered to make my home: my dishes, cups, bowls, mugs, silverware, kitchen utensils, bakeware, baking needs, pans, small appliances, cleaning products, laundry products, luggage, books, CDs, photos, photo albums, frames photographs, arts and craft supplies (dork), wrapping paper, stationary, computer, computer accessories, lamps, power cords, approx. 9,000 balls of yarn of tens of assorted mismatched knitting needles, personal doccuments, records, journals, curtains and curtain rods, all my shoes, all my handbags, all my clothes, linens, towels, pillows, the contents of my medicine chest, my hair dryer, all my freakin' beauty products and toiletries, spare boxes of Kleenex and sticks of Deodorant waiting to be called up to active duty, the Baby Stair Master MommyCakes gave me, my Winter Coats, board games, scrap books, my desktop fan and all the weird assorted knick knacks and talismans I have seen fit to schlep from Eastern Europe; guess what? When you are trying to get all of this stuff into boxes you have scavenged from the streets like a homeless person preparing for a hurricane it is a lot of freakin' stuff!!!

Then I start panicking that I really won't be able to afford the new place. "Don't worry," my friends tell me. "You have a good job. You make decent money." I am comforted until I remember these are the same people who told me that I don't have that much stuff.